Woke up this mornin’ with a twitch in my eye,
Coffee pot broke, and I let out a sigh.
The dog chewed the cord to the internet box,
Now I’m sittin’ here talkin’ to a wall and a clock.
Bills are stackin’ up like laundry I forgot,
I'm one bad mood away from losin’ the plot.
My nerves are totally shot, I swear I'm barely hangin' on,
Feelin’ like a rubber band stretched way too long.
I laugh, then I cry, then I shout at the sky—
If one more thing goes wrong, I might just say goodbye
(to sanity, not y’all—I ain’t goin’ nowhere).
Yeah, my nerves are totally shot, and I just don’t care.
Some folks say, “Girl, just breathe and relax,”
But I’ve tried that, along with bubble baths and snacks.
The washer's broke, the cat threw up on my shoe,
And my voicemail’s full of things I still gotta do.
I keep smilin’ like a pageant queen on cue,
But inside I’m screamin’ like a kettle about to spew.
My nerves are totally shot, I'm a mess in disguise,
Tryin’ to hold it together with duct tape and lies.
I laugh, then I cry, then I talk to the wall—
If one more thing happens, I might just lose it all.
But till then, I’ll sip this tea and plot...
‘Cause my nerves are totally shot.
Don’t need a vacation, I need a padded room,
Or maybe just a quiet night with no sense of doom.
Give me one day where nothin’ goes wrong—
Till then I’ll keep singin’ this broken-nerved song.
Yeah, my nerves are totally shot, and that’s just the truth,
I’m a tired soul in stretchy pants, losin’ my youth.
But I’ll laugh, then I cry, then I throw up my hands,
And hope the good Lord above still understands.
Life’s a lot... more often than not—
Yeah, my nerves... are totally shot.
So, one day I came home, and after a hectic day at work, I came home to this! I thought it would be a good song. I have never heard anyone out there ever put this to words and I feel that it is my obligation to put things into song that nobody would even consider singing about.
Married in Arkansas 